


You Broke the Shovel

by HawkyBarton



Series: OTP and Fanfic Brigade (Prompts galore) [64]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Shovel Talk, That's it, clint shames the avengers, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-13
Updated: 2015-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-20 13:13:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4788479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HawkyBarton/pseuds/HawkyBarton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Avengers Shovel Talk</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Broke the Shovel

**Author's Note:**

> Anon asked: Hi, love your phlint fics! Especially the young Clint ones :). Just wanted to put a request in for Phil and the shovel talk avengers style.

The Avengers were a scary bunch. 

Even for a hard-core SHIELD Agent like Phil Coulson, they could be intimidating when they banded together. 

So when Phil dropped off Clint from their date at the door of his floor in the tower, he wasn’t expecting the entire troop to be waiting for him in front of his. 

“May I help you?” Phil asked, full Agent mode. 

Tony waved a hand, “Don’t give us that crap Agent Agent”

Phil raised an eyebrow, “Is there a reason you all are standing in front of my door?

Steve nodded, “Yes. May we come in?”

Phil blinked, “Sure...”

Phil opened the door and walked in, the Avengers all piling in after him. 

Phil laid his jacket over the edge of the couch and turned to the rest of the team.

“Alright, what do you guys need to talk to me about?”

Natasha shook her head, “Sit”

“Excuse me?”

“ _Sit”_

Phil sat down slowly and looked at them. They stared back with steely glances, and Phil used all his training to make sure he didn’t look like he was intimidated slightly.

“I’m sitting, what do you guys want?”

“Clint’s our best friend” Bruce said instead of an answer. 

Phil nodded, “He’s mine too... What would be your point?”

Thor shook his head, “You misunderstand, Son of Coul. He’s our best friend, and we wish him only the best”

Phil blinked, “Are you guys giving me the shovel talk?”

Steve nodded, “I guess you could call it that”

Phil sighed, “You all know that I would rather hurt myself than hurt Clint”

“Which is what would hurt Clint” Natasha butt in.

Phil raised an eyebrow, “Excuse me?”

Tony rolled his eyes, “If you asked Legolas to marry you today, he would say yes in a heart beat.”

Phil’s eyes widened, “Wait really”

Natasha groaned, “8 years of pining and you still don’t believe he loves you unconditionally.”

Phil blushed, “Uh... Right... Yeah”

“ _Anyway,”_ Tony continued. “We love Phil as our best friend, and if you hurt him we’ll tie you up until he forgives you, because it would be worse if we killed you”

Everyone else literally sighed in the exact same way, in the exact same time. 

Phil nodded, “Right”

“Uh... Guys? What are you doing?”

Phil watched in amusement as the Avengers’ eyes went wide as they spun around to look at Clint.

“Uh....?” Steve tried to scramble for an answer. 

“You’re giving him a fucking shovel talk aren’t you?” Clint asked the group. “What did I say?”

“You said not to give a shovel talk” Thor said quietly.

“That’s right I did. Now, what are you all gonna do now?”

“Leave?” Steve said. 

“That’s right. I love you all, goodbye”

The Avengers slunk out quietly, the metaphorical tails between their legs. When they left the room Phil started to laugh hysterically. 

Clint just flopped next to Phil and cuddled up to him. “Sorry”

“No worries babe” Phil said with a grin. 

**Author's Note:**

> (( You can prompt me if you wish for other fics, or for any ideas you may have about this fic at [ Hellogoodbye](http://hellogoodbye741.tumblr.com/ask) ))


End file.
